The dictionary definition of reminisce is: to recall past experiences, events, etc.
Everyone in life will always reminisce of past events that occurred in their lives. Big or small memory, a memory is something that is in the back of our mind and we think back to it whenever we feel nostalgic. Reminiscing gives us the opportunity to look back in our own lives and remember events that made us into the person we are today. The time that I reminisce the most, is when I'm lying in bed trying to fall asleep. I'm not the type of person that can fall asleep easily unless I'm really tired, so since I have all that free time a lot of things run through my mind. People always say that "girls think too much", but in reality, guys think just as much as girls do. Thinking is the time God gave us so that we can reminisce back on an event that happened, good or bad, and how it effected the person we became. Usually a person's first thought would be a good memory, because honestly who wants to remember a bad memory that happened in their life? I'm not saying that means that we don't think back on our bad memories because both of them are what really made us into the people we are today. We take what we learn from those experiences and events and keep the lessons learned from them for future situations. We reminisce on many things in life, not only a particular subject. It may range from a life-changing event, to maybe a girl/guy you like. For me personally, when I reminisce I think about all situations. From girls to my future, my past to who I am now, and events in my past that have changed my way of thinking or my life in general. I just got back from a mission trip to Dominican Republic and what a blessing that was. There is always that cliche of what a person's attitude is when they return from a poverty country, of how that person is so grateful of what they have and how they are blessed compared to the other people. Honestly, that's just a feeling many people are going to feel, no matter it being a cliche or not. It was my second time here, and the Dominican Republic and it's people always open my eyes and my mind to a new way of thinking. That feeling of gratefulness and blessing is not a pity feeling, but more of a slap-in-the- face feeling. What i mean by that is the Dominican people may have way less then we do back in the states, but they take what they have and are so happy and praise and thank God for it. It was such a blessing the second time being there, and I know that God is going to do many great things there. Another thing that has been on my mind recently is the simple question of "where the heck is my mind at?". As I said earlier, I am the type of guy that does a lot of thinking before I go to sleep, being either a big or small thing. So since I've been back from DR, I've just been thinking about my life here. I've known this for a long time, but recently it's been hitting me even harder. The fact that I have many emotional scars from the past and how I've been dealing with them my whole life. Throughout my life, I would try to fill that void with many things: girls, popularity, friends, and i realized that every time I did that it never kept me satisfied. God is the only person that can heal and mend my broken heart and emotional scars, and I've rarely given him the chance to mend it all up. For the topic of girls, I've just had way too many situations that were really unnecessary and even though I knew God didn't want me to, I still went and did it. When it comes to my future, there are so many things that I'm unsure about, but I put my trust and faith in God and I know that He will take care of me and let me know what He wants me to do in my life for Him. I let go of my past because I knew it was hindering my relationship with God to grow. The reason for this blog entry is that I want people to know that it's okay to think too much. People say that thinking too much is a problem, but I believe it's okay to a certain extent. I think God made human beings to think too much, because if not, we wouldn't be caring about anything really. People should think out certain situations, but not towards the point where they feel they need to do things to take control and do something about it. God is in control and just as long as we trust in Him, we will be fine. Reminiscing is the time for us to spend with ourselves, thinking back or ahead, on situations and events that we care about. Because in reality, who honestly will think too much about something that they really don't have a care about? The reason we think too much about specific events/people is because we care about that certain person or situation. So I'll leave you guys with a song and you can look it up and listen to the lyrics: Hillsongs - Amazing Love (You are my King).
The lyrics i want you guys and girls to focus on the most is the chorus:
Amazing love, how can it be
that you my King would die for me
Amazing love, I know it’s true
It’s my joy to honor you
In all i do i honor you.
There are many things in life that we think and reminisce on, but one thing that we should always have on our mind and wonder is how our loving Father would send his son to die on the cross for all our sins, just so we can spend eternity with Him. He didn't have to save us, but He loves us so much that He wanted each and everyone one of us to be with Him in Heaven. I hope this blog helped someone out, and thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
You can never really prepare yourself for a Miracle.
There are many things in life that we can prepare ourselves for. We can prepare ourselves for a job interview, a date you may be going on later on that day, our future, etc. One thing we can never really prepare for is a miracle. A miracle is something that just happens. The dictionary definition of miracle is: an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause. God creates miracles in our lives, that show us that He is in control and that it is Him and Him alone that controls everything. A miracle is of course a good thing to us, something that makes our lives better in one way or another. I have seen many miracles in my life, including last summer when I went on my first mission trip to Dominican Republic. The miracle that happened there was just an eye-opening blessing to everyone. We came there to teach the kids about God, but we got taught in return with many valuable life lessons. It was a miracle to see how precious God was to them. Even though they had very little possessions, they still thanked God for all they had and kept their relationship with Him strong. The mission trip was a miracle in my eyes, because i saw how God works through all different kinds of people: shy, unprivileged, low self-esteem, beggars, etc. As long as the person was willing to be used for His glory, God used that person to show true love to another unbeliever. Dominican Republic 2008 was a miracle in the sense of how even though we came there expecting the worst, God blew our minds and surpasses our worst thoughts. He showed us how it feels to live outside of our little bubbles, and that was a eye-opener in the sense that we now can appreciate all that God has blessed us with and not take it for granted. The miracles were simply saving people through the mission trip like the Dominican people that came to know God and the missionaries that needed this mission trip to strengthen their relationship with Him. Miracles don't have to be something huge and physically able to see, but it can also be a miracle on the inside. The miracle i felt through that mission trip on the inside was a refreshing new way of thinking, and getting rid of the mind set that could have ruined my future. There is now 5 more days until I am going back to Dominican Republic for another mission trip. I thought that seeing how I had already been there once, I would know exactly what to prepare and expect, but there are only five more days until I leave and I don't know what I'm doing. All I can do is depend on God and just trust in Him and I know that everything is going to be fine. So I am very excited to see what miracle God will show me through this mission trip, because I know that God will be in the midst of our praise and fellowship. Now don't get me wrong, the mission trip is not something that you can just breeze through easily. It takes a toll on you physically, mentally, and spiritually. Many people always wonder why someone would be willing to go through all this hardship, but there is a saying, "Don't let go of something you can't go a day without thinking about." God is someone that I can't go a day without thinking about, because of the fact that He is my everything. Without Him, I'm nothing, but with Him, I can achieve everything. So I am willing to go through whatever I have to, to bring people to know this awesome Savior and Father that sent his only son to die for our sins on the cross. The hardships is nowhere compared to what Jesus Christ had to go through to allow us to live, so isn't that something that would make us want to do anything we can to bring people to know such an amazing person? I remember talking to a girl before and she asked me, "How do I know you're going to do all the things you say for me?" I simply replied, "If it's worth it, I will do anything to have it." Isn't that the mentality everyone has in life that if something is worth all the hardships and trials that we will be willing to go through that to have that thing in the end? Well God is way more then worth it, so I am willing to give my all to live for him. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
-Paul Lem.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Judgment.
Dictionary definition of Judgment: the ability to judge, make a decision, or form an opinion objectively, authoritatively, and wisely, esp. in matters affecting action.
Everyone judges people at one point in their lives. It may be a judgment made about a person from their past, present, or future. People may judge a certain person from their past. This is probably the one that I could relate to the most. Because of my past experiences and mistakes I may have made, people judge me from that even if they say they wont. There are always two scenarios with new people I meet when I tell them about my past: one is they judge me automatically and put up a wall and watch me carefully or just too scared to even talk to me anymore, and the other is they say they won't judge me but when they see me do something that will remind them of what I told them about my past they automatically say to themselves "oh I knew it, he's still like that". I've learned to deal with it because it has happened many times in my life, and it doesn't matter to me because I know I'm different now and that's all that matters. Judgment is something people always assume they don't do, but they do it unconsciously. Judging someone is just like making an assumption about a person. The type of judgment that happens in the present deals mainly with assumptions. People assume things about you by the way you act, the way you dress/talk, and the way you carry yourself. After that they will put you into a certain category, but isn't that the exact same thing as judging someone? For future judgments, this has to do with guessing. By the way you perceive and judge them as a person in the present, you guess and assume what kind of life they are going to live and what kind of person they will be in years to come. This is probably the least damage of judgment on a person unless said aloud to the person, because then it will just cause an argument to arise. But I'm not saying that it's okay to judge a person's future because judging someone is something we shouldn't be doing in the first place. In the bible, God says, "Do not judge, or you too shall be judged." Everyone judges, and that is why everyone keeps getting judged back. It's a cycle that does need to be broken, only if we are all willing to see past first impressions and actually take the time to get to know the person inside and out. This is a touchy topic for me, because like I've said, it's something that I go through all the time with my past. It's something that i wish didn't happen but just because I don't want people to judge me, doesn't mean they aren't going to. One day i came across this quote on the internet. The quote said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them". This is so true, in the fact that the time we take to judge a person, could be the time to get to know such a loving and caring person. Also, if we judge a person by their past, we may just put up a wall and stop talking to that person when we could've had a good friend or lover. Judgment is still a constant struggle in all of us, but it's only a problem if we can't control it and we let it get the best of us. So I'll just leave you guys and girls not with a song but a prayer request really. My grandma has been in the hospital for the past three weeks with pneumonia. She has it in both lungs, and i was just wondering if you guys and girls could just pray for her. I'm sure she will get better, but it would be awesome if there were more prayers so God will heal her quicker. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
Everyone judges people at one point in their lives. It may be a judgment made about a person from their past, present, or future. People may judge a certain person from their past. This is probably the one that I could relate to the most. Because of my past experiences and mistakes I may have made, people judge me from that even if they say they wont. There are always two scenarios with new people I meet when I tell them about my past: one is they judge me automatically and put up a wall and watch me carefully or just too scared to even talk to me anymore, and the other is they say they won't judge me but when they see me do something that will remind them of what I told them about my past they automatically say to themselves "oh I knew it, he's still like that". I've learned to deal with it because it has happened many times in my life, and it doesn't matter to me because I know I'm different now and that's all that matters. Judgment is something people always assume they don't do, but they do it unconsciously. Judging someone is just like making an assumption about a person. The type of judgment that happens in the present deals mainly with assumptions. People assume things about you by the way you act, the way you dress/talk, and the way you carry yourself. After that they will put you into a certain category, but isn't that the exact same thing as judging someone? For future judgments, this has to do with guessing. By the way you perceive and judge them as a person in the present, you guess and assume what kind of life they are going to live and what kind of person they will be in years to come. This is probably the least damage of judgment on a person unless said aloud to the person, because then it will just cause an argument to arise. But I'm not saying that it's okay to judge a person's future because judging someone is something we shouldn't be doing in the first place. In the bible, God says, "Do not judge, or you too shall be judged." Everyone judges, and that is why everyone keeps getting judged back. It's a cycle that does need to be broken, only if we are all willing to see past first impressions and actually take the time to get to know the person inside and out. This is a touchy topic for me, because like I've said, it's something that I go through all the time with my past. It's something that i wish didn't happen but just because I don't want people to judge me, doesn't mean they aren't going to. One day i came across this quote on the internet. The quote said, "If you judge people, you have no time to love them". This is so true, in the fact that the time we take to judge a person, could be the time to get to know such a loving and caring person. Also, if we judge a person by their past, we may just put up a wall and stop talking to that person when we could've had a good friend or lover. Judgment is still a constant struggle in all of us, but it's only a problem if we can't control it and we let it get the best of us. So I'll just leave you guys and girls not with a song but a prayer request really. My grandma has been in the hospital for the past three weeks with pneumonia. She has it in both lungs, and i was just wondering if you guys and girls could just pray for her. I'm sure she will get better, but it would be awesome if there were more prayers so God will heal her quicker. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Self-Esteem.
Dictionary definition of Self-Esteem:
- a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect.
Many times in life we perceive and define ourselves how others see us. We forget that God made us each in a special way with our own talents, gifts, skills, etc. The way we carry ourselves and how much confidence/self-esteem we have definitely can set a certain impression of us to a certain person. This not only happens with people we meet for the first time, but also with our friends. How we carry ourselves around anyone, automatically gives them a impression of us which is the same as them judging us. They judge us by the way we act and assume things about us that may or not be true. But we fall into that category of their judgement and they always think of us as that certain person. Eventually if you keep depending on your self-esteem by what others think of you, you lose your individuality and mainly yourself. You don't know who you are, and you need other people to tell you. It's sad how big of an impact other people's thoughts have on us, when God is the one that created us and we should always remember we are perfect in His eyes. God is the only person that should actually be uplifting our self-esteem. We are PERFECT to him, he created us exactly how he wanted to so shouldn't that help us to have a better sense of self-esteem/confidence in ourselves? People tend to forget about that because they are so consumed by the world and what's accepted in it. It's hard to see friends that you know are so awesome inside, throw themselves out of the game because they don't have God in their lives telling them how beautiful, good, and worthy they actually are. Who gave us the right to bring someone else down in order to make ourselves look better, but still it happens all the time in life. I am happy to say that i do have confidence in myself and i know who i am as a person so i don't let others opinions affect me as how i view myself. There might be a little chance of time where that may happen, but i automatically remind myself of how God perceives me and i get that thought out of my mind. But i do know of many people that have too low confidence/self-esteem to even start anything as in a relationship. They feel that they aren't good enough because PEOPLE don't praise him/her for their good looks, nice personality, charm, etc. It kills me inside because i know that guy/girl is going to be such a good boyfriend/girlfriend if they actually went for it, but they always take themselves out before they get the chance to. If anyone hasn't caught on by now, the reasons why my blogs are so "deep" and whatnot, is because i want to share my experiences/thoughts on a certain subject or thing that i feel may be of help to someone that may be going through it. These past few days i've just noticed throughout people and their self-esteem. My heart goes out to them because while talking to them, i can see how depressed and sad it makes them. So i felt that i should blog about it, hopefully helping them and others that may be having trouble with their confidence/self-esteem. Shouldn't we as christians not bring our brothers and sisters down but uplift them? The issue of self-esteem is something many if not all people go through in some aspect of their life. After my birth mother left me and my family, i felt that i really wasn't worth anything. I felt i needed to prove myself in everything i did so i can prove to myself that i am actually worth something in life. So getting the approval of my father was a big aspect in my life in the past. But i never could reach his expectations and it took me a while to realize that it as long as i try my hardest God is proud of me and that's all i need. Whenever i feel like i'm not good enough for my dad's expectations, i always turn to God now because i know that as long as i'm doing my best, He is proud of me. As long as i'm doing the BEST i can, and being ALL i can be for God, He will be so proud of me. I think that is a big boost of confidence to know that God created you and you are perfect in his eyes. He is all powerful and to know that you are perfect and worthy to him, should be enough to overcome and heal all those confidence/self-esteem scars of the past. I hope that this has touched and maybe helped someone in any way because my heart does really go out to everyone when it comes to this. So i'll leave you guys with a song you can look up on youtube and listen to the lyrics: Tommy Walker - He Knows My Name.
Some lyrics i hope helps you guys is this the chorus of this song:
He knows my name,
He knows my every thought.
He sees each tear that falls,
He hears me when i call.
You are that important to God where he knows everything about you, every thought you have, every tear that falls from your eye, whenever you call he will always listen and answer you. So don't ever feel you aren't good enough in life, because God says you more than enough and he loves you. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
- a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself; self-respect.
Many times in life we perceive and define ourselves how others see us. We forget that God made us each in a special way with our own talents, gifts, skills, etc. The way we carry ourselves and how much confidence/self-esteem we have definitely can set a certain impression of us to a certain person. This not only happens with people we meet for the first time, but also with our friends. How we carry ourselves around anyone, automatically gives them a impression of us which is the same as them judging us. They judge us by the way we act and assume things about us that may or not be true. But we fall into that category of their judgement and they always think of us as that certain person. Eventually if you keep depending on your self-esteem by what others think of you, you lose your individuality and mainly yourself. You don't know who you are, and you need other people to tell you. It's sad how big of an impact other people's thoughts have on us, when God is the one that created us and we should always remember we are perfect in His eyes. God is the only person that should actually be uplifting our self-esteem. We are PERFECT to him, he created us exactly how he wanted to so shouldn't that help us to have a better sense of self-esteem/confidence in ourselves? People tend to forget about that because they are so consumed by the world and what's accepted in it. It's hard to see friends that you know are so awesome inside, throw themselves out of the game because they don't have God in their lives telling them how beautiful, good, and worthy they actually are. Who gave us the right to bring someone else down in order to make ourselves look better, but still it happens all the time in life. I am happy to say that i do have confidence in myself and i know who i am as a person so i don't let others opinions affect me as how i view myself. There might be a little chance of time where that may happen, but i automatically remind myself of how God perceives me and i get that thought out of my mind. But i do know of many people that have too low confidence/self-esteem to even start anything as in a relationship. They feel that they aren't good enough because PEOPLE don't praise him/her for their good looks, nice personality, charm, etc. It kills me inside because i know that guy/girl is going to be such a good boyfriend/girlfriend if they actually went for it, but they always take themselves out before they get the chance to. If anyone hasn't caught on by now, the reasons why my blogs are so "deep" and whatnot, is because i want to share my experiences/thoughts on a certain subject or thing that i feel may be of help to someone that may be going through it. These past few days i've just noticed throughout people and their self-esteem. My heart goes out to them because while talking to them, i can see how depressed and sad it makes them. So i felt that i should blog about it, hopefully helping them and others that may be having trouble with their confidence/self-esteem. Shouldn't we as christians not bring our brothers and sisters down but uplift them? The issue of self-esteem is something many if not all people go through in some aspect of their life. After my birth mother left me and my family, i felt that i really wasn't worth anything. I felt i needed to prove myself in everything i did so i can prove to myself that i am actually worth something in life. So getting the approval of my father was a big aspect in my life in the past. But i never could reach his expectations and it took me a while to realize that it as long as i try my hardest God is proud of me and that's all i need. Whenever i feel like i'm not good enough for my dad's expectations, i always turn to God now because i know that as long as i'm doing my best, He is proud of me. As long as i'm doing the BEST i can, and being ALL i can be for God, He will be so proud of me. I think that is a big boost of confidence to know that God created you and you are perfect in his eyes. He is all powerful and to know that you are perfect and worthy to him, should be enough to overcome and heal all those confidence/self-esteem scars of the past. I hope that this has touched and maybe helped someone in any way because my heart does really go out to everyone when it comes to this. So i'll leave you guys with a song you can look up on youtube and listen to the lyrics: Tommy Walker - He Knows My Name.
Some lyrics i hope helps you guys is this the chorus of this song:
He knows my name,
He knows my every thought.
He sees each tear that falls,
He hears me when i call.
You are that important to God where he knows everything about you, every thought you have, every tear that falls from your eye, whenever you call he will always listen and answer you. So don't ever feel you aren't good enough in life, because God says you more than enough and he loves you. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
The Past.
"Don't regret the things you've done before, because it's made you the person you are today." So many people say this but its a hard quote to follow really. Doing stupid stuff in the past may make you more intelligent as a person, but it still doesnt mean that you dont regret doing it. Many people today let the past define us as a person. All the struggles and hardship we go through makes us a stronger person forsure, because i've gone through so many and i know i'm strong in these areas. Things that may break someone down that hasn't gone through much hardship in the past, doesn't phase me at all. I EXPECT good things in my life to be gone in a matter of time and it's always happened. Some people just have such great lives. They have perfect family, good relationship with God, rarely go through any hardship, have amazing oppurtunities, etc. I used to envy these people so much when i was down and out. But i realized that God did this for a reason. I'm a stronger person than many people i know because of all the struggles and hardships i've gone through in life, and i am thankful for that. Even though every good thing that comes into my life goes away in a matter of time, i know that God is eternal and will never leave me and He's all i need. There's that saying, "People come and go in your life, but God is eternal." That is so true in many ways. When i'm going through so much in life, i feel so lonely. God is the only one who comforts me in my time of need. He's the only one that will always think of me first, and make sure i am okay and just stay there with me when i'm in pain. He doesnt have to say anything at all to me, just the fact that He is there with me shows that he cares for me and loves me so much. I always get these weird phases in my life. In all these phases, i do think way too much and it makes me feel even lonelier. In the past, i used to never turn to God when i felt like this because i would turn to people around me instead. I turned to everyone but the one person that actually really truly care about me, which is God. I've been trying to remind myself to turn to God whenever i do feel lonely, but it's a work in process. But i know that God will send me people that will help me through times like these and be there for me always and i love him so much for that. So yeah i'll leave you guys with this song and you can look it up on youtube and listen to the lyrics: 3t - Disappear. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
-Paul Lem.
Friday, April 17, 2009
19.
People always quote that one saying, "Age is just a number." That is true in some ways and not so in other ways. I mean im turning 19 soon, it doesnt even feel like its my birthday coming up. I dont realize really why to this point people still celebrate their birthdays. I mean its cool to do that in junior high and under but i mean once u reach high school and all that gaining another age just brings more responsibilites onto you. I think also for my age i've just gone through many more experiences than average people that have made me mature quicker. I feel like i'm old already but it turns out that i'm only turning 19. It's weird how that works out, but than i mean i'm sure God put me through all the stuff in my past to make me mature quicker because it's better this way. I know what i should be doing and what i shouldn't, i have my proritites straight, and forsure looking back my old lifestyle was just plain stupid. High school was just a stupid time and now that i've matured past that i can see other people in that same situation, people starting to get into that situation, and etc. I feel that i can try to help them not get into those stuff, but i mean if they don't listen once or twice or even more than that, than it's really on them and they can just face judgement. Just came back from a praise night and i thought it was much needed forsure. Now-a-days i've been too consumed by the worldly things like my busy schedule that i really have been neglecting God and he's the only thing that matters to me. I'm neglecting the one person that cares about me the most and wants the best for me which is to have eternal life with him in Heaven. I think it's so amazing when people in relationships right now spend so much time thinking about that person, wanting to be with that person, talk to that person, etc. but when it comes to God it's nowhere near that. He should get all that and more from us because there is a relationship between God and us if we have that relationship of course. I feel that i have learned that forsure throughout the years and it's something i have been constantly trying to apply. When there is a girl in my life, i want to talk to her, i want to be with her, i want to see her, i think about her, and so on but i feel that God should get a million more of that from me because He saved my life. He's been with me through thick and thin, never leaving me and i love him. God is love and without God in my life, my life is meaningless. So as i age another year i know God is going to teach me many more things and show me many more miracles/oppurtunities and i thank him for that. So i'll leave you guys and girls with a song and you can look it up on youtube and listen to the lyrics : Switchfoot - Dare You To Move. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
-Paul Lem.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Happiness.
Dictionary definition of HAPPY: characterized by or indicative of pleasure, contentment, or joy.
God is happiness. Or in the words of my friend "Joy is from God, and happiness can be anything tiny from God". It's amazing when i think back how stupid i was to think that certain things made me happy in life, things that took me away from my true happiness which is God. I would feel happy in my sin because sin makes you feel good, you wouldn't be doing it if it made you feel bad. So having God back in my life really has made my life more happier. Pastor Chris actually talked about something today that i felt really got to me and made me think. He told us about how he wanted to date this one girl but God told him not to, but he still did and disobeyed God's wishes. Everytime he would pray to God while being with that girl, God would always say "break up with her, i don't want you dating her", but he said "make me break up with her if you want me to than." He challeneged God and by doing that, something terrible happened. I feel that i am like this with God many many times. In the past, i usually would depend on a girl to keep me happy so i would constantly have someone in my life at the time. But it's like most of them i wasn't supposed to date, but i went against God's wishes and nothing good came out of that relationship. The thing that is worse is that i pushed the girls away that actually could've impacted my life and strengthen my relationship with God because i was selfish and thought i knew what i wanted when i really didn't. The world can't make us happy. No matter how much we try to do things our way, if we don't listen to God and do his will, we will never know the true meaning of beying joyful or happy. God is my source of happiness and whenever i am feeling down, i need to remind myself of that because he is true happiness. He will make all the pain, worry, fear, sadness, anger, any negative emotion away. If you depend on God alone, he will take care of you because you are his son/daughter and he loves you so much. Growing up, i never really knew what it was like to have that motherly love, since my birth mother left me at the age of 1, but through that incident God showed me that love through my grandma. She was like my mom growing up, and my dad was working all day so i never really grew up with that fatherly support either. I needed to learn things that other kids learned from their parents on my own, and i felt because of that i was always a step behind. But God works in mysterious ways, and he gave me many gifts, talents, and skills that have helped me to become as strong as a person as i am today. One time during a retreat a guy prayed for me and said "God wants you to know that he loves you." and than after that he said "God says, 'I'll be that father to you paul. I'll be that father you need.'" That's just how God works. He is so amazing and it just leaves me in awe. During that time i actually got accepted to Azusa Pacific University and rejected to all the other colleges i applied to because i screwed up in my first 2 years of high school. But when i showed my dad my acceptance letter, all he could say was "You're so stupid you couldn't even get into Cal State Fullerton?" So i was just feeling pain because i wanted to make my dad proud but his expectations were way too much for me and i just could never reach it in my life ever. So God spoke to me through another person when i really needed it, and i love him so much for that. But God is always with us, and basically the point i'm trying to get across is that He is the source of true happiness. If you think that you are happy in this world and you dont know God, than you are just blinded in your sin because without him no one will know true happiness and joy. So i'll leave you guys and girls with this song and you can look it up on youtube and listen to the lyrics: Hillsongs - At The Cross. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
God is happiness. Or in the words of my friend "Joy is from God, and happiness can be anything tiny from God". It's amazing when i think back how stupid i was to think that certain things made me happy in life, things that took me away from my true happiness which is God. I would feel happy in my sin because sin makes you feel good, you wouldn't be doing it if it made you feel bad. So having God back in my life really has made my life more happier. Pastor Chris actually talked about something today that i felt really got to me and made me think. He told us about how he wanted to date this one girl but God told him not to, but he still did and disobeyed God's wishes. Everytime he would pray to God while being with that girl, God would always say "break up with her, i don't want you dating her", but he said "make me break up with her if you want me to than." He challeneged God and by doing that, something terrible happened. I feel that i am like this with God many many times. In the past, i usually would depend on a girl to keep me happy so i would constantly have someone in my life at the time. But it's like most of them i wasn't supposed to date, but i went against God's wishes and nothing good came out of that relationship. The thing that is worse is that i pushed the girls away that actually could've impacted my life and strengthen my relationship with God because i was selfish and thought i knew what i wanted when i really didn't. The world can't make us happy. No matter how much we try to do things our way, if we don't listen to God and do his will, we will never know the true meaning of beying joyful or happy. God is my source of happiness and whenever i am feeling down, i need to remind myself of that because he is true happiness. He will make all the pain, worry, fear, sadness, anger, any negative emotion away. If you depend on God alone, he will take care of you because you are his son/daughter and he loves you so much. Growing up, i never really knew what it was like to have that motherly love, since my birth mother left me at the age of 1, but through that incident God showed me that love through my grandma. She was like my mom growing up, and my dad was working all day so i never really grew up with that fatherly support either. I needed to learn things that other kids learned from their parents on my own, and i felt because of that i was always a step behind. But God works in mysterious ways, and he gave me many gifts, talents, and skills that have helped me to become as strong as a person as i am today. One time during a retreat a guy prayed for me and said "God wants you to know that he loves you." and than after that he said "God says, 'I'll be that father to you paul. I'll be that father you need.'" That's just how God works. He is so amazing and it just leaves me in awe. During that time i actually got accepted to Azusa Pacific University and rejected to all the other colleges i applied to because i screwed up in my first 2 years of high school. But when i showed my dad my acceptance letter, all he could say was "You're so stupid you couldn't even get into Cal State Fullerton?" So i was just feeling pain because i wanted to make my dad proud but his expectations were way too much for me and i just could never reach it in my life ever. So God spoke to me through another person when i really needed it, and i love him so much for that. But God is always with us, and basically the point i'm trying to get across is that He is the source of true happiness. If you think that you are happy in this world and you dont know God, than you are just blinded in your sin because without him no one will know true happiness and joy. So i'll leave you guys and girls with this song and you can look it up on youtube and listen to the lyrics: Hillsongs - At The Cross. Thanks for reading.
-Paul Lem.
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